Being a mom is my most loved adventure. Helping my little ones navigate developmental milestones in this sometimes unforgiving world gave me an exhilarating sense of purpose.

For them, I have always tried to make each birthday memorable. I was always going over the top, stressing about making the day perfect. If I am being honest with myself, I dislike birthdays.

This stems from childhood.

As a child, my birthdays were more about my mother than myself. She was the center of attention. The gifts were always something she wanted for me and not what I wanted. Ever. As I grew, I started to shy away from celebrating.

I would rather forget a day that most plan on all year.

The first birthday that meant anything to me was my twenty-first.

That day I was blessed to have created my first golden memory. My best friend made me feel like a princess. She made me feel loved. The smell of tequila still brings me back to laughing so hard we had tears streaming down our faces. The type of laughter where your sides hurt for days afterward. A night full of acting a fool and giving no thought to who was watching. That night I started a new year of firsts, starting with all the confidence I had been missing.

Fast forward in life, and I have always tried to make each of my kids’ birthdays something to remember. I have spent endless hours listening to them and planning the best day with them at the center, and each day started with sprinkled pancakes and lots of laughs. Occasionally we would have large parties with all our family and friends. But those quickly turned into our goofy little group spending much-desired quality time together. I wanted my kids to have all I didn’t, a day that made them feel extra special.

The only thing I had ever really wanted.

This year, on my birthday, I decided to say YES.

40 is:

A new healthier outlook on life.

A calmer mindset.

A Healed soul.

A year of new beginnings.

This next year for me, will be a “Yes” year.

More yes without fear. Knowing it’s ok to set boundaries and have those boundaries respected by those you choose to share your time with.

Knowing my worth and not settling for anything less.

Bring on the laughing so hard my cheeks and sides hurt.

More amazing memories with my little goof troop.

New photos.

New experiences.

My only birthday wish for the universe this year is to find a soul’s connection that will transcend time and space. I know my soul mate is out there somewhere. He’s probably lost and just too stubborn to ask for directions.

– XOXO