You haven’t spoken to me in a year. You don’t know the person I’ve become, the changes I’ve made, or the lessons I’ve learned. Yet somehow, my past mistakes are still sitting in the room between us like uninvited guests.

I said I was sorry.

Not because it was easy, but because it mattered to me. Because I valued what we had, and I understood the weight of what I did. But sometimes, it feels like those words fell into a void—echoing back as reminders of who I used to be, not who I am today.

When Apologies Get Stuck in Time

The hardest part about growth is realizing that some people will never see it. They freeze-frame you at your lowest moment, even as you’ve worked tirelessly to move forward. They clutch the version of you that made the mistake and hold it like evidence in a trial that never ends.

But here’s the truth:

I am not that person anymore. I can own what I did without being defined by it forever. My apology was real, but so was my evolution.

Why Do We Do This to Each Other?

Maybe it’s easier to hold on to hurt than to risk trusting again. Maybe forgiveness feels like surrender, like saying what happened didn’t matter. But forgiveness isn’t forgetting. Forgiveness is freedom—from resentment, from bitterness, from being chained to a version of the past we can’t change.

When you refuse to let go, you’re not just punishing me—you’re punishing yourself.

What You Don’t See Now

You haven’t heard the way I talk to myself differently now.

You haven’t seen the boundaries I’ve built to prevent old patterns.

You don’t know the nights I spent unpacking the “why” behind my choices, the therapy sessions, the quiet prayers, the relentless work of becoming someone better.

You only know who I was. Not who I am.

So Here’s What I Need You to Understand

I said I was sorry because I meant it.

But if you can’t see beyond the apology—if you can’t allow space for redemption—then that’s not about me anymore. That’s about what you’re holding on to. You projections will no longer hold me back. I won’t stay stuck in a story that no longer fits.

I’ve turned the page.

Even if you never do.

-🦩