Roar louder than your demons

There’s a heaviness some of us carry that doesn’t make a sound.

It doesn’t clink like chains or leave bruises on our skin. Instead, it hides in the pauses between conversations, in the moments we paste on a smile, in the way we say “I’m fine” a little too quickly.

It’s the weight in the shadows that no one sees the quiet burden of pretending everything is okay when, in truth, our world feels like it’s slowly unraveling.

Masks are tricky things. They can look so natural that even we start believing them after a while. We laugh at the right times, keep our schedules filled, and post photos that capture a moment of brightness rather than the hours of darkness that surrounded it. People comment, “You look so happy,” and we nod, too tired to explain otherwise.

Pretending becomes a performance we know by heart. It’s our way of surviving in a world that often struggles to hold space for discomfort. When someone asks how we are, we instinctively respond with, “Good, thanks,” even if our chest feels hollow. Why? Because telling the truth feels dangerous. Because what if they pull away? What if our honesty is met with silence?

But here’s the thing: wearing the mask too long doesn’t just protect us it erases us. The more we cover up, the harder it becomes to remember who we are beneath the performance. We forget what it feels like to speak unfiltered words, to share unpolished emotions, to breathe without tightening our jaw first.

Carrying an invisible weight doesn’t only live in the mind. Our bodies become the storage units for everything we don’t say. The tension settles in our shoulders, our backs, our stomachs. Sleep becomes restless or nonexistent. Our appetite shifts sometimes we can’t eat at all, other times we eat just to feel something.

The body whispers at first little signals that something isn’t right. A headache. A knot in the chest. A racing heartbeat that comes out of nowhere. But when ignored, those whispers grow louder. Exhaustion, illness, chronic pain these become the body’s way of screaming the truth we won’t admit out loud:

I am carrying too much.

And still, we push forward. We tell ourselves, Just one more day. Just hold it together a little longer. Until suddenly, holding it together is no longer an option.

Perhaps the hardest part of all is the invisibility. No one sees the shadows because we’ve become skilled at keeping them hidden. But that invisibility comes with a cost: it convinces us that we don’t matter enough to be noticed.

We scroll through social media, watching others share milestones, vacations, laughter. Meanwhile, we sit in the quiet of our own chaos, wondering why it feels like we’re drowning while everyone else seems to float. We tell ourselves we shouldn’t bother others with our struggles, that people are too busy, that they wouldn’t understand anyway. And so, the distance grows.

Loneliness isn’t just the absence of people it’s the absence of being seen. We can be surrounded by friends, coworkers, even family, and still feel painfully isolated if no one recognizes the weight we’re dragging behind us. That silence, that invisibility, can become heavier than the burden itself.

Beneath the mask, beneath the exhaustion and the silence, there is usually a longing so simple it almost feels naive:

To be seen, understood, and accepted as we are.

We don’t always need someone to fix things. We don’t always need advice, or solutions, or pep talks about positivity. What we need, often, is presence. Someone who says, “I don’t need you to be okay. I just want you here.” Someone who listens without rushing us through our pain. Someone who reminds us we don’t have to carry the shadow-weight alone.

At the core, we long to know that our brokenness doesn’t make us unlovable. That our struggles don’t disqualify us from belonging. That even in the messiest, darkest moments, we are still worthy of care.

If you’re carrying that shadow-weight right now, let me say this clearly, you are not weak.

You are not broken.

You are enduring something heavy that most people will never know or understand and you’re still here. That is strength, even if it doesn’t feel like it.

You are allowed to let the mask slip. You are allowed to admit, “Actually, I’m not okay.” You are allowed to ask for help, even if it feels uncomfortable. And you are allowed, most of all, to rest.

And if you are someone who notices cracks in the mask of a loved one, don’t underestimate your role. You don’t need perfect words. You don’t need to “fix” them. Just noticing, just sitting with them, just saying, “I see you, even here,” can be enough.

Because the weight in the shadows becomes lighter not when it disappears, but when it’s finally shared.

-🦩